


Danger Stranger

by lilolilyrae



Series: The 666 Words Ineffable Husbands Series [7]
Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Aziraphale Loves Crowley (Good Omens), Body Swap, Crowley Loves Aziraphale (Good Omens), Getting Together, M/M, Post-Almost Apocalypse (Good Omens), Pre-Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-21
Updated: 2019-06-21
Packaged: 2020-05-14 17:27:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19277998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilolilyrae/pseuds/lilolilyrae
Summary: A demon in a tub filled to the brim with holy water, and an angel stands in the fire... at least, it seems like it.





	Danger Stranger

**Author's Note:**

> my babiiiies  
> I read a tumblr post a while ago about how the actor's faces in these scenes could mean that Crowley and Aziraphale are thinking about how the other would die in the danger they face... so I had to write this.

Aziraphale is in hell.

Literally.

Apart from this fact, it isn't really that bad, so far- sure, the way down was a lot less elegant than what he is used to from ascending to heaven, and down there everything is quite filthy with mould on the walls and vermin everywhere, but while the angel would usually prefer a more cleanly environment, he has helped many a human in need in the past and seen environments far worse than this. At least the demons seem to take enough care of their infrastructure to ensure nothing is in danger of collapsing. 

 

 

Meanwhile, Crowley is still on his way to heaven.

While the demons had been quick to grab 'Crowley', the angels are still going through ten stages of bureaucracy while 'Aziraphale' is first calling out for his friend in terror, then valiantly raising his head, awaiting judgement.

But they're still busy discussing who whll have the honors of accompanying him into heaven. Oh well. You'd think excessive and annoying bureaucracy and hierarchies would be a downstairs invention, but no...

 

In hell, Beelzebub is the one giving orders. There is no real trial and then Michael- Michael, really, Aziraphale would not have expected them to ever associate with demons- is bringing the holy water. 

And isn't that dangerous to the demons? So much of it, an entire tub full of it- there ought to be some accident and- oh, no, they're actually going to throw one of their kind in it to test it, they probably wouldn't care if one accidentally fell into it, either- 

Oh dear. That is truly a horrifying effect.

Of course Aziraphale knows what holy water does to demons. Kills them, actually ends their existence. But seeing it done- seeing the pain- Aziraphale is glad he has never seen something like this before in the six thousand years he walked on earth. He doesn't think he would have been able to give Crowley the flask full of it, if he had.

Forcing his mind away from his friend and back into character, he asks to pull of the jacket- "It's new!". It's what Crowley would have done, for sure.

Once he sits in the tub, he basks a little in the fuzzy feeling of the holy water, and while it doesn’t feel as good as it should- Crowley might actually be onto something saying Aziraphale was a little bit less holy than other angels- it still helps him stay in character. What Would Crowley Do? Oh, ask Michael for a towel, for sure! And now, being able to command that annoying person around is something they can certainly both agree on.

 

When they are finally moving upwards, Crowley has to supress a gasp at the realization where he will be going.

Somehow, in all the hours of planning, staying awake all night and then listening to the angels discuss his fate, it had never really _occurred_ to him that he would, actually, get to see heaven again. So now despite the obviousness of it all it comes a bit of a shock, but that’s mostly just the surprise of it all. Then-nothing. And isn’t that weird? Shouldn’t he feel- something? Anything? Either hatred or a feeling of home- perhaps regret that he isn't part of it anymore?

But all Crowley feels is the knowledge that he doesn't belong- the same way, actually, he tends to feel in hell.

 

And then he doesn’t get to ponder over his emotions any longer, because while the angels sure love their bureaucracy, once their decision is made, it is made, and they won’t be kept waiting.

Hellfire sprouting from the heavenly ground. Oh, the irony…

Any angel would die in this. Aziraphale would die in this, Crowley had thought not too long ago that he had already lost his friend to this… But he can’t keep getting distracted. What would Aziraphale do? Oh, his brave, silly, _silly_ little angel.

Crowley straightens his spine and walks headfirst into the fire.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I usually only check the comments once I post the next part (sorry, busy life atm, I do appreciate all of you and I love seeing a new comment notification!!!) anyways what I'm saying it that's a pretty foolproof way to get informed about new parts of this series :)


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